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59 best sales team names that are clever, funny, and only for closers

59 best sales team names that are clever, funny, and only for closers Blog Feature

Liz Moorehead

Director of Web & Interactive Content, Speaker, Host of 'Content Lab' Podcast

March 12th, 2020 min read

I have a problem. 

I have to name everything.

My car is named Moxie. (You know, like: "This girl's got moxie!")

I also have a swell little hammer named Agnes. I just bought a really cool mid-century modern chair with mustard yellow cushions from 1955 for my new apartment, and I named him Gary. My favorite beer glass is named Kramer. 

Unfortunately for those who know me, this little "quirk" of mine is somehow both a feature and a bug... so to speak.

Anyway, this otherwise annoying habit does have its uses. Particularly when it comes to naming things that are supposed to be named — like teams! 

Which is why you're here, you plucky sales rockstars

For those of you who need a sales team that says, "I mean business! No, literally, I mean business — please sign this contract," you've come to the right place.

What follows are some of my favorite sales team name options ready-for-use. 

Enjoy! 

Best sales team names for clever closers

  1. Closers Only Jacket
  2. It's Business Time
  3. Proposal Pushers
  4. Sultans of Sale
  5. Quota Crushers
  6. Revenue Your Engines
  7. The Value Props
  8. Pipeline Pros
  9. One Call Closers
  10. Arizona Oceanfront Property
  11. Let's Make a Deal
  12. Empty Coffee Cups
  13. Sir Close-a-Lot
  14. The Cash Cows
  15. Dollars to Donuts 🍩

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  1. Prospect Casanovas
  2. Money Magnets
  3. The Boiler Room
  4. Profit Party 
  5. Cold Caller Ballers
  6. Always Be Crushing
  7. Commission Cowboys
  8. Cubicle Closers
  9. Miracle Workers
  10. Sign Right Here
  11. Closing Me Softly
  12. Just Following Up
  13. Come Sale Away
  14. Funnel Floozies
  15. The Closed Wons

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  1. Conversion Commanders
  2. The Lead Hustlers
  3. Use the (Sales)Force
  4. Peaches and CRM
  5. The BeeDees
  6. Low-hanging Fruitpickers
  7. Qualified Qualifiers
  8. Coffee's for Closers
  9. Opportunity Knocks
  10. Outbound Outlaws
  11. The Money-makers
  12. Risky Business
  13. Slidin' in Your InMails
  14. When's a Good Time to Call?
  15. B2B Bosses

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  1. The Decision-makers
  2. EOD Dominators
  3. What Time Works Best for You?
  4. Revenue Rodeo Clowns
  5. The C-sweet Spot
  6. Business as Usual
  7. Bonus Earners
  8. It's Raining Leads
  9. MQL Wranglers
  10. Did You See My Last Email?
  11. BD Bandits
  12. The A-Team
  13. Masters of Spin
  14. Who's the Boss?

Still want more revenue-crushing goodness? Here are our 89 favorite motivational quotes for sales teams.

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